..with someone who hurts me.
You can’t make sense of an addiction from the inside out, but oh, I’m trying.
He lights me up, turns me on, makes me want to dance and play.
But he isn’t here. He is spending his time as he sees fit, elsewhere.
He is absent. I am distressed.
I am tired and beginning to hate myself. For my cowardice, and stubbornness, refusing to let go. More than let go, refusal to say no.
He returns, and pulls me in deeper. It makes no sense to refuse, now I am finally getting what I want.
Until I’m not.