I need to get serious, though

Published February 23, 2016 by 51percentawesome

Relationship contract.

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I declare I am in sound mind and faculties and am fully capable, to the best of my knowledge, of making this commitment. I declare I have no problematic or unresolved drug, alcohol or gambling problems, or other addictions such as but not limited to computer gaming or pornography. I have completed an internal review and based on my past experiences and sum knowledge of myself I am capable of being loving, honest and kind within an intimate relationship.  Likewise, I have fully considered and assessed all relevant aspects of my potential partner and I consider us to be compatible based on personality, values and life goals. I understand my potential partner to be strong-willed, intelligent and free-spirited, and I willingly choose this. I understand that a loving relationship requires introspection and growth and I accept this. I understand this contract can be amicably dissolved under the circumstance that our personalites, values or life goals change to such an extent as to make this relationship no longer desirable.

If and when, however, I decide I am unwilling or unable to meet the requirements of this relationship, for reasons including but not limited to: a sense of inadequacy, resentment from residual and unaddressed parental issues, unresolved emotional attachments to previous partners or friends, interference from friends and family which I fail to mitigate, or any number of infidelities including intentional lying, lying by omission, kissing or having sexual relations with a member of the same or opposite sex without prior consent, our termination fee is $1000.

The relationship will be terminated in the event of repeated neglect or abuse, including but not limited to avoiding contact outside a reasonable turnaround time (4 hours work day, 9 hours overnight) without warning or reasonable explanation, creating expectations which are then revoked without reasonable explanation (such as texting from work and then getting resentful when texted at work, travelling a lot for the relationship and then getting angry when requested to drive), making commitments such as but not limited to planning to move in together, planning to work together, planning to have children together, planning to travel together which are later revoked with no logical reason, engaging in crazy making behaviours such as ignoring expressions of distress or dismissing perceptions (you’re thinking too much, you’re reading into it), consuming or participating in violent, degrading or otherwise harmful sexual paraphernalia, as well as any of the above listed violations.

The above trangressions will incur the stated break of contract fee. Should the relationship then resume, the contract is considered to renewed and the termination fee will apply for each individual transgression.

This clause is legally binding and will be pursued in a civil court of law as required. Payment can be made in cash, credit card, direct deposit or via PayPal.

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